Sunday, July 19, 2009

7/19

It's our last morning at Lake Placid. It's chilly and the clouds are heavy and full of drama as they roll over the mountains. The shadows and light are constantly changing on the peaks. I could watch forever.

I love this area....the Adirondaks. It's another place I would not hesitate to return to. I'd even consider living here if I could. I've learned a couple of things over the last couple of years. I love altitude, and I connect more with lakes than the ocean.

Is it just me...or are vacations complicated? Overall, the five of us ave had a good time together. But, there have been points of such incredible frustration (on my part). The maintenance level of the members of this family is exhausting. I'm not going to go into a lot of detail, but there were so many times I'd look at one of them and think "just get over it!" "IT" was never worth the negative energy being put forth, and certainly not worth unloading said energy on everyone else. I love these four people but some of them (2 in particular) are really difficult to spend extended time with. They're just too needy, and pissy when their needs are not met. And somehow...if I try and address that fact, it all gets turned around and becomes about ME. I just don't get how that happens.

So, as beautiful as it is here....as happy as I feel in these surroundings, I'm ready to get back to LI where we can go our separate ways and have some space. It makes me sad that THAT is what I'm looking forward to. It's not supposed to be this way, is it? I'm haunted with wondering where I went wrong.

5 comments:

Cindy said...

It's wonderful that you are in your bliss ~ surrounded by mountains & the lake. The way you describe it, it sounds like a slice of heaven.

As far as the needy family members, I understand. And no, it's not supposed to be this way...but it so often is. Be happy you have your beautiful family; be happy that you've all had this time together; and be happy that today you go home :) LOL!

Love you and miss you to pieces...xo

lisaram said...

It is not where YOU went wrong, Kat. At some point, people are responsible for their own happiness or unhappiness. It is not your job to make them happy.

Teen-age/young adult children are difficult. And so are husbands of a certain age. I think that is written in stone somewhere...

Cynthia said...

Sometimes closeness isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Coy said...

I am so connected to the ocean and it is difficult to even imagine not living near it ever again but lakes ... ahhhhh in lakes and waterfalls I also find bliss. Glad you shared your adventure with us.
As for where you went wrong ... I would say that you probably havent gone as wrong as you were feeling you did when you wrote this. Releasing our need and desire to control things that are not within our control like "someone elses pissiness" is where we go wrong. You can only change things that are within your own control and everyone else has to take responsibility for themselves.
*** Coy ***

Kathy said...

Ah, but that's just it ... don't wonder where you went wrong ... you didn't, really. There comes a turning point in everyone's life when they choose who they will be and how they will act and there's not a thing we parents can do about it.

I'm glad you found your happy place to visit. I'm a mountain and ocean girl. I can never get enough of either.