12/17/03

Back in the Swing
It has been SO miserable here - I haven't walked in 3 days! This makes me nuts. It makes my dog MORE than nuts. There is very little that will stop me from my walk. I don't mind the cold, I don't mind the dark. But if it's actively precipitating - I just can't do it. I always walk early because I know that once the kids are out the door, things will start happening and I won't get to it - then I feel like a slug.
But FINALLY, when the alarm went off today I didn't hear rain. So up and out I went. Berkeley (my golden) was beside himself. When I leave it is still dark, the stars are often so clear. And by the time I'm heading back toward the house, I'm usually treated to a sunrise. It's an awesome way to start the day.
I'm having to make a little adjustment though - because of this recently lost friend. We started talking over a similar interest in music. We both collect live Bruce Hornsby shows. We had traded some shows (it's legal) and I always listened to them on my walk. The music is just incredibly motivating. Upbeat, always different, just good fun. I'd walk and sing, sometimes dance a bit, and just enjoy the world around me. Sometimes I'd see wildlife, sometimes the sunrise was just extra spectacular. I'd run into the house, get online and send a babbling email to this friend about how great the music was and what I'd thought about while I was out. He was like my journal - and he ALWAYS wrote back, and encouraged me to write more.
Today I had to reorient my thinking. I didn't listen to Bruce - it's painful for the time being. And when I thought about running in to write - I was glad I'd started this journal. My thoughts today were all about making this switch, and watching for icy patches - YIKES! I can't afford a fall. I wonder if he misses my morning ramblings - they were always so up because I was SO UP. I wonder if he's sorry he's shut me out. Slap me - I've got to stop wondering.Written by sunflowerkat321

This entry has 2 comments:
It is tough to lose a friend like that unexpectedly. It does make you wonder for a long time. But like you said, you have your journal now. Keep walking. Keep feeling SO UP. You have us to write to now and we are reading.Comment from hillareeday - 12/20/03 12:49 PM

Nothing at all wrong with wondering, Kat.Glad Mother Nature finally decided to cooperate. Man, she's fickle.Comment from andreakingme - 12/18/03 2:46 PM