12/18/03

Nocturnal Visits
Inspired by andreakingme and onmiownnow2 - I'm remembering a very vivid dream I had about my dad. He was a big guy with a big laugh and a big heart. My sisters and I adored him. It's still hard to accept that he's gone.
He was ill for a long time before he died, so we really watched him waste away. He'd been a long time smoker and started having lung problems. He had surgery and was never really the same. He'd lost so much lung capacity, he had enough breath to get around and that was about it. He later had a brain tumor - that's a story for another time.
I rarely remember my dreams - but I'm so glad I remember this one. I dreamed that my husband and children and I had moved to a new house. We were very excited about it. The doorbell rang and my parents were standing there. My dad looked GREAT! He was robust, full of life, laughing. I got one of his big warm "Daddy Don" hugs. We showed them all around the house. He held my hand and kept smiling at me. We were talking and laughing. But then, as we were finishing the tour, he started to fade. It was then I put it together that he was dead and this was a dream. But as he faded he said to me "it's just such hard work to be here." I woke up feeling like he had visited me. I took it as a message that wherever he is - he is whole again. And he summoned all his energy to get here to let me know that. That gives me peace.Written by sunflowerkat321

This entry has 3 comments:
This is wonderful! My nephew had a dream about his grandfather ,who in his dream told him "nothing is what it seems to be" and after visiting said " I have to go now" I'm trying to convince him to start a jouranl and write about it.Comment from mrscheesestix - 1/12/04 1:39 PM

I envy you. I loved my sister and my dad...miss them more than I can say. But I don't dream about them. Seems like in order to get past the sadness, I had to shut them out completely, even from my subconscious. How I would love to be able to see them---alive and whole---in my dreams. :-]Comment from mlraminiak - 12/19/03 12:56 AM

WOW! This seems like MORE than a dream, Kat. It seems like a real visit from your dad! I bet he wanted to give you closure and peace for having to watch him die as you did. What a heartbreaking thing to have to do. Your poor family. I love the idea behind your magical dream. And I'm so glad you shared it!Comment from andreakingme - 12/18/03 2:52 PM